


where there's blood there's always bone

by blueabsinthe



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: Anal Sex, Communication Failure, Established Relationship, Hand Jobs, Introspection, Loneliness, M/M, Offseason Shenanigans, Tampa Bay Lightning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-08
Updated: 2017-07-08
Packaged: 2018-11-21 20:41:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11365251
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blueabsinthe/pseuds/blueabsinthe
Summary: Where there's lost there's always home.





	where there's blood there's always bone

**Author's Note:**

  * For [boltschick2612](https://archiveofourown.org/users/boltschick2612/gifts).



> This fic fought me all the way, which I was not happy about. Hopefully, it doesn't show in the fic.
> 
> Also, the title and summary are lyrics from The Naked and Famous song 'Losing our Control', which was basically on repeat while I worked on this. 
> 
> Hope you like it, boltschick2612.

Ben’s Los Angeles apartment offers an award-winning view of the sunset. It’s all dark blue for miles as he watches the sun sink below the horizon. He thinks even Tampa’s sunsets would be jealous. The LA sky is on fire, it seems. Yellow-orange juxtaposed with lush pastel pink and purple streaks, and a smattering of lavish twinkling stars. There’s a stillness in the air, despite it feeling thick and viscous. It smells like rain, which Ben finds odd, seeing as how it hasn’t rained in days. 

The impending loneliness is like a knot in the pit of his stomach, despite the new contract with Dallas he signed. Ben thought Tampa was home. He knows it’s the nature of the business. Knows it’s wrong to get attached to one place. It doesn’t hurt any less. 

He knew LA was only a temporary stop in what he hoped would be a long career in the NHL. Dallas in the fall looms like a dark cloud on the horizon. He doesn’t want to think about the fall yet, though. How lonely it will be. Lonelier than he feels now. He knows he shouldn’t feel lonely, but he can’t help it as he watches the lights of the city fade in the distance. 

This is a new development, Ben thinks. 

This unobstructed, uninterrupted view of LA as it settles into its nightly slumber. Everything during the season is go-go-go, Ben has a hard time catching his breath. Sometimes he feels more at home in a hotel room than in his own bed. 

But, this?

This quiet moment, staring out at the horizon, watching as the skyline burns. It’s a nice view, he thinks. Outside looking in. In the distance, he can hear the surf as it crashes against the shore. Ben can almost feel the sand between his toes and the sticky salt from the surf in his thick, dark hair.

Ben savours the momentary quiet. There is everything and nothing keeping him grounded. The distant sound of the surf feels far away and yet close all at the same time. Ben almost feels like he is where the surf is, far away from his churning thoughts and the ordered chaos of his apartment. 

It is a foolish thought. He knows better. 

The patio door opens behind him, and Ben doesn’t need to turn to know Val is behind him. He can feel his presence like a gut shot. Ben still marvels at how the mere presence of Val can still make him feel like they are the only two that exist. Val arrived earlier in the morning, appearing in Ben’s life like something spectral. Sometimes Ben wants to pinch himself to make sure he isn’t dreaming. Val reminds him of everything he has and everything he feels like he will be leaving behind when he’s in Dallas and Val is in Philadelphia come the fall.

Val’s silvery-light eyes are soft and gentle as he leans against the doorframe. “Come inside, pet,” he says.

Ben lifts his head from the cradle of his hands to glance at Val. The sheer curtains billow around him; Ben couldn’t tell where Val left off and the curtains began. He wants to reach for him, trace his fingertips along Val’s jawline, hear the way his voice would hitch at the action. _Give me something … anything. Anything to make me stop worrying this isn’t the end._

Val crosses the distance separating them and presses his hand against the small of Ben’s back. Ben can almost feel the current of electricity radiating from the tips of Val’s fingers and into his spine. 

“Everything’s packed,” Val says.

Ben steals a glance at him from the corner of his eye. Val is shirtless in the fading sun, all bronzed skin, and sharp lines. It isn’t the first time the mere presence of Val leaves Ben bereft of speech. His throat thickens, and he swallows in an attempt to form words. 

“Where do we go from here?” Ben asks. He wishes it didn’t sound as much like a question as it did.

Val sighs, braces his arm against the porch railing his hair damp and windswept. Ben’s heart skips a beat as he watches the way Val turns to look at him. “I think you know.”

Ben reaches out to touch Val’s elbow. “Val -” His voice sounds haggard and exhausted.

“Shh,” Val instructs, curling his fingers around Ben’s wrist, thumb brushing over the pulse point. “We have time.”

“That’s just it,” Ben says, hating the way his voice cracks on the last word. “I can’t help think that -“

“Ben.” Val’s voice is soft but forceful.

It’s the way Val’s voice hitches and holds his name like he could touch the very core of Ben’s being. It melts any remaining hesitation Ben has. He trembles as Val’s fingertips graze his side and curl around his hip. He looks down, catching Val’s gaze, the pale blue of his eyes so deep Ben could get lost for days if he let himself.

Ben pulls his shirt over his head, the heat of Val’s gaze burns as he fumbles with the button on his jeans. His hands are shaking, and Val’s fingers are between his waistband and his skin, and any forms of proper speech Ben has disappear. 

Val tilts his head up, meeting Ben’s lips halfway across the space. Ben runs a hand on Val’s cheek and draws him closer, kissing him in alternating short and languid bursts, until he feels drunk off of him. Ben is unsure of where home is anymore, but when Val kisses him it’s the closest thing he can think of. It’s equal parts romantic and pathetic, and it makes Ben’s chest hurt.

“Come inside,” Val whispers.

Ben goes, because this is all he has for now. He leaves the door open, the curtains billowing in the breeze. He thinks about Val naked on his sheets, sheets that smell like his cologne and his warm skin. He remembers the way Val would dig his nails into his skin, leaving tiny half-moon marks in the soft flesh. Ben is sure he can hear the rush of blood through veins as his teeth graze over the thin skin of Val’s neck. Val clutches at Ben’s hips, maneuvering him until they’re pressed together. Ben can feel Val shiver as his fingers trace the outline of his hipbones, and tease over the bumps of his ribcage. 

He traces Val’s mouth with the tip of his tongue, coaxing Val’s mouth open. It feels like their first kiss all over again. It always feels like the first time. Val kisses like life, light, and summer. Ben pins him against the wall, his hands tracing each line and curve of Val’s skin. Val trembles under his touch.

Ben braces his hands on the wall as he grinds against Val, earning him a gasp from Val and a scrabbling of his hands against Ben’s back. Their lips are still pressed together, although, Ben thinks it’s less like they are kissing and more sharing breath. Ben’s hands are gripping Val’s hips, maneuvering his lower body into a better position. Val manages to wrap a leg around Ben’s hips, grinds against him. 

“Need you,” Ben whispers against Val’s lips before his hands are tugging on the zipper of Val’s jeans. He shoves at the denim and pushes them down Val’s hips, before hauling Val’s hips flush to his. 

Ben could feel Val’s breath leave his body in short, desperate bursts. His teeth catch on Val’s lower lip and scrape a bite into the fleshy part of his bottom lip. He manages to shove Val’s boxers down until they bunch around his knees. Ben can feel Val digging his nails into his forearm as he wraps his fingers around Val’s cock. Val clings to Ben, teeth nipping at any, and every bare inch of Ben’s skin he can find.

“Wanna see you naked, pet,” Val manages to get out.

Ben pulls himself away from Val long enough to shove his jeans and underwear down his hips and off. He pushes Val back into the wall, slides a thigh between Val’s and pins him to the wall. 

Val kisses Ben like he is starved for him, fingers tracing the line of Ben’s jaw. “I can’t… don’t make me wait.”

“Shh. Stay there,” Ben whispers before he backs away. Val rids himself of his jeans as he watches Ben disappear down the hall to the bathroom. 

Ben came back minutes later, eyes dark and lips puffy from their kissing. Ben pins Val against the wall, bending his head down to nuzzle against Val’s throat. “So good … gonna be so good when I fuck you.” Ben let his hand slide down Val’s body, letting his nails graze over the skin. 

“Fuck,” Val gasps as Ben’s fingers circled his cock and stroked in a long, languid glide.

“Gonna be so good. Fuck, Val.” Ben lowered himself enough to maneuver Val’s left leg over his hip. Val manages to get his balance, a hand gripping the counter, the other curling around Ben’s neck. 

Ben manages to pop the top on the bottle of lube, slicking his hand. He catches Val’s mouth in a bruising kiss as he curls slick fingers around Val’s cock. He strokes Val in alternating slow and fast strokes, swallowing every muffled cry with his mouth. 

He adds more lube to his hand, before Ben slides his hand between Val’s legs, fingers teasing his entrance. Ben hears the sharp intake of breath as he pushes two fingers inside. “Shh,” Ben murmurs as Val gasps and pushes down against his fingers. 

Ben feels Val’s cock twitch against his stomach and a string of curse words leave his lips like a litany. “You drive me fucking crazy.” 

“C’mon,” Val urges.

Ben pulls away to slick his cock with more lube before he pushes Val further up against the wall, moving him into a better position. Ben’s breath leaves him in short, warm bursts as he struggles to get his cock into position. They’re both still as Ben’s cock pushes into Val, past tight muscles. Ben groans as Val slid down the wall and the rest of the way down his length. 

“Been a while,” Ben remarks, biting his bottom lip, fingers digging into Val’s ass. “Fuck.” 

Val does his best to grind down to meet Ben’s thrusts. Ben holds Val up against the wall, gripping his ass to steady him as he thrusts deeper.

“Fuck, Ben. Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Val manages to say, fingers digging into Ben’s back.

Ben has his face buried in Val’s neck as he thrusts up into him. Val tightens his thighs, his calves, and his ass around Ben. Ben curses as he feels Val bite his shoulder, and it is only through sheer willpower he doesn’t drop him. 

Val can sense Ben’s close in the way his thrusts grew more erratic, fingers digging into flesh. He tugs on Ben’s hair, forcing him to look at him. 

“C’mon, pet,” Val urges, “wanna feel you as you come.” He grinds down harder and harder against Ben. “C’mon.”

It only takes a couple more thrusts before Ben captures Val’s lips in a bruising kiss and comes with a shudder. The feel of Ben’s cock twitching inside him is enough to push Val over the edge, and he comes in hot, white bursts between them, while Ben rides out the rest of his climax.

Ben slowly pulls out of Val and helps lower him to the floor. It takes every ounce of strength Val has not to collapse to the floor. Ben keeps an arm curled around Val as he leans his head down toward him. He kisses the tip of Val’s nose and smiles. “Easy there …” 

Val brushes the damp strands of hair back from Ben’s face. “I got you,” he whispers. 

Ben sighs, traces the length of Val’s spine with his fingertips. “I know. I know.”

And, for the first time in a long time since the season ended, Ben feels like he is home.


End file.
